Tag Archives: humor

Chinese Tattoo Failures

If you are getting a tattoo, and you think it looks cool in a foreign language…  My advice is to use several translators and see what they say it means.  There are people who help authors translate the proper way from one language to another – use them.  Don’t rely on your own research, friends who think it would be funny, or tattoo artists.  Here are some examples why…

2 Comments

Filed under Humor and Observations

Cow Fart Apocalypse!

Big methane burp: Cow farts a greater problem than EPA previously thought, study says

Published November 26, 2013

Associated Press
  • cows.jpg
    AP GRAPHICSBANK
  • 0e10a3e0b9f52327440f6a70670069d4.jpg

    A Cessna plane, making continuous observations of carbon dioxide, flying over an Atmospheric Radiation Measurement tower used by the Energy Department near the town of Lamont, Oklahoma. (AP PHOTO/ROY KALTSCHMIDT, LAWRENCE BERKELEY NATIONAL LABORATORY)

  • cows feed at dairy farm.jpg

    July 16, 2013: Cows feed at a dairy owned by Lucas Loganberg and his family, that sits on one of the proposed routes of California’s high-speed rail system, near Hanford, Calif. (AP PHOTO/RICH PEDRONCELLI)

WASHINGTON –  The United States is spewing 50 percent more methane — a potent heat-trapping gas — than the federal government estimates, a new comprehensive scientific study says. Much of it is coming from just three states: Texas, Oklahoma and Kansas.

That means methane may be a bigger global warming issue than thought, scientists say. Methane is 21 times more potent at trapping heat than carbon dioxide, the most abundant global warming gas, although it doesn’t stay in the air as long.

Much of that extra methane, also called natural gas, seems to be coming from livestock, including manure, belches, and flatulence, as well as leaks from refining and drilling for oil and gas, the study says. It was published Monday in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science.

The study estimates that in 2008, the U.S. poured 49 million tons of methane into the air. That means U.S. methane emissions trapped about as much heat as all the carbon dioxide pollution coming from cars, trucks, and planes in the country in six months.

While the world has a good handle on how much carbon dioxide is pumped into the air, scientists have been more baffled by methane emissions.

That’s more than the 32 million tons estimated by the U.S. Environmental Protection Administration or the nearly 29 million tons reckoned by the European Commission.

“Something is very much off in the inventories,” said study co-author Anna Michalak, an Earth scientist at the Carnegie Institution for Science in Stanford, Calif. “The total U.S. impact on the world’s energy budget is different than we thought, and it’s worse.”

EPA spokeswoman Alisha Johnson said her agency hasn’t had time to go through the study yet, but hopes it will help “refine our estimates going forward.”

While the world has a good handle on how much carbon dioxide is pumped into the air, scientists have been more baffled by methane emissions. They have had to use computer models to estimate how much methane is going into that air.

This study, however, was based on nearly 13,000 measurements from airplane flights and tall towers, the most used in any such research.

The information was collected in 2008, right at the beginning of the natural gas boom from hydraulic fracturing. So these measurements, which will be repeated for 2012, don’t include much impact from fracking, Michalak said. Studies recently have shown conflicting results about how much methane escapes during fracking and other forms of fossil fuel drilling.

Outside experts praised the study. Robert Howarth at Cornell University called “it very compelling and quite important. This is the most comprehensive study yet.”

Michalak said because of the way they measured methane — just looking for it in the air as opposed to tracking it from a source — it is hard to say what is putting more methane into the air. But she said by looking at concentrations — especially within Texas, Oklahoma and Kansas — the scientists have a good idea: Cows, oil and gas.

Nearly one-quarter of the U.S. methane emissions came from those three states. Texas is by far and away the No. 1 state for refineries that turn oil into gasoline. Texas and Oklahoma have been big oil and gas drilling states and Kansas is a big cow state.

Cows seem to be spewing twice the methane that scientists previously thought, Michalak said.

While burps and flatulence are part of the methane emission from cattle, University of California Santa Barbara professor Ira Leifer said a bigger factor is manure.

“If you shovel it into an artificial lagoon you are creating the perfect production for methane, but it cuts down on the smell and your neighbors complain less,” he said.

___

Online:

Journal: http://www.pnas.org

___

Seth Borenstein can be followed at http://twitter.com/borenbears

3 Comments

Filed under Humor and Observations

Government Work

I was driving along the freeway in heavy traffic one day when I saw a Department of Transportation truck driving on the side landscaping area.  Traffic was so slow, I watched as a man got out, got a shovel from the back, then dug a hole.  He then drove off.

As traffic continued slowly, bumper to bumper, I saw another Department of Transportation truck come up.  This time another man got out, grabbed a shovel, and then filled the hole.

I continued to watch this use of my taxpayer dollars until traffic finally eased enough I could catch up to the two of them and demand an explanation.  After all, they work for me, the taxpayer right?

I managed to flag down both trucks.  The men ambled over to me, saw I was upset and crossed their arms.

“I’ve watched you now for some time!” I shouted.  “You there, you drive along and dig holes and then you over there, you fill them up.  What the hell is this?  Why are you wasting my tax dollars like this?”

The first spoke up.  “Look Buddy, it’s not our fault.  You see my name is Joe and it’s my job to dig the holes.”

The second spoke next, “And my name is Frank, and it’s my job to fill the holes.”

I just stared angry.

“Well you see,”  said Joe, “Bobby called in sick.  He’s the one that drives between us and sticks in the trees.”

[Yes, this is a joke and not a true story.  It is only funny because we all know it could have been true.]

1 Comment

Filed under Humor and Observations

Random Humor for your Hump Day

Random humor – Enjoy!

Leave a comment

Filed under Humor and Observations

Random Humor

Some random humor to bring you into the weekend.  Enjoy!

1 Comment

Filed under Humor and Observations

Artists Will Understand…

For all my artist friends – Did you ever find it cool that of all the most ancient works of man, the earliest and best preserved are the cave paintings?

The burly hunter would stroll in with his fresh kill, all proud and haughty, look at the artist and say -” No one cares about your stupid drawings! Why should I give you some meat for those, what about the exposure you get by having your work on my cave wall?”

1 Comment

Filed under Animals, Humor and Observations

Coolness…

You may be cool, but are you Kate Upton cool where people wait in line to touch your hair or see others touch her hair?

kate upton

 

You may be cool, but are you …

ow

 

 

3 Comments

Filed under Animals, Humor and Observations

Random Humor

Some more random humor to give you a chuckle on your Friday and start you off right for the weekend.

Leave a comment

Filed under Humor and Observations

Random Humor

Some random humor for Hump Day.  Hey, at least hump day came one day earlier thanks to Veterans Day…

hump day

Leave a comment

Filed under Humor and Observations

Crossovers (Mash-ups) for Fun

A recurring post, the following are crossovers or mash-ups where you take two or more disparate things and put them together, hopefully with some humor:

2 Comments

Filed under Humor and Observations